BAM And Demons And Butlers? OH MY!
by 13animenurd13
Summary: B.A.M And Demons And Butlers? Oh My! What complete and utter Chaos! A cage and a bullwhip! Sebastian afraid? STRAWBERRIES? Just what is going on in the Phantomhive Estate?


The sky was of the clearest blue and the sun was shining brighter than any other star in the universe. The wind was blowing hard, but not hard enough to cause a sandstorm. Three young teenage girls were having the best Memorial day vacation they could, enjoying the lovely weather, the beach and each others company. The youngest and the middle child of the three, rolled down the sandy dunes of the Santa Monica beach, having a blast.

The eldest and tallest of the three stood atop the dune smiling and videotaping her friends crazy antics. She sighed as her two crazy idiotic friends started chasing after each other and tackling each other to the floor. Each, were rewarded with a face sand in the ground. The eldest giggled as she walked down the dune to her friends.

"Come on Alec! Come on Bri! Let's set up for our..."

The eldest didn't have time to finish for the middle child, now known as Alec, shouted loudly as she ran past the duo towards the blanket, "CINCIP!"

The eldest blinked as she processed what Alec shouted, then proceed to sigh. "Why must you say things backwards?"

Alec paused in her running in a circle and smirked. "Because 1," she held up a finger,"I'm EPIC like that!", she held up a second finger, "and 2... It's fun annoying you, Mi-chan!~"

Mi-chan, more commonly known to others as Micah, twitched and tried her best to ignoore Alec's comment. She turned to her other companion, "Bri, what are we going to do with her?"

Before Micah had has any more time to speak, Bri had smacked her hand to her forehead and stared intensely at her. Bri smiled goofily and shouted, "YOU'VE BEEN ON THE BEACH!"

Micah blinked before sighing. "Really?"

Bri just smiled before yelling, "YCNALC!" then, proceeding to do a downwards hand movement before running to Alec and joining her in her running circle.

"Sometimes I worry about you guys..." Micah chuckled before setting up the umbrella.

Not even 2 seconds after the umbrella was set up, a strong gust of wind came in and sent it flying. Unfortunately for Alec, who happened to be in its path of trajectory, was immediately smacked in the face. The result being the fact that she toppled over, back first.

Micah and Bri giggled at the scene a little longer before helping their uncoordinated friend up. However, another strong gust of wind came flying in and knocked the umbrella out of their hands. So once again, the umbrella smacked Alec in the head sending her flying into the ground face first.

By this point in time, Bri was rolling on the floor laughing and Micha was trying to hold back her laughter.

Alec groaned as she steadily got to her feet again. "N-n-not funny!" she pouted.

The two just giggled at their clumsy friend.

Another gust of wind came, and the treachery attacked poor Alec again, only this time she dragged her two companions down with her. "Ha! VICTORY IS MINE!"

After the umbrella fiasco and lunch, Micah dragged the two down to the ocean. She then jumped into the barrage of green ocean waves. Her purple one piece suit, seeming to sparkle. She took off her white cover up, threw it on the sand and calmly walked into the semi-warm water again. As Micah finally was waist length in the water, a blonde blur passed Micah's figure.

Bri settled her self in a sumo wrestler position and shouted,"BRING IT ON!" her blue tie dye two piece skirt swimsuit shaking with her anticipation of the upcoming wave.

Micah laughed, then blinked. She turned around to where the final companion was backing away from the water. "Woman! Come on!"

Alec shook her head and growled at the water. She then released what appeared to be a hiss at said body of salty liquid.

Bri, who had already conquered a wave, convinced Alec to come in the water. "Alec! Come here now and join in the AWESOMENESS!" as Bri was saying this, a huge wave came in and caused her to go under.

Alec laughed as Bri emerged a second later, with her short nearly shoulder length blonde hair thrown in her face. Seeing her friend get topped by a wave made Alec want to join in on the fun. She quickly put her long orange brown hair in a tight ponytail and waded into the water. She resisted a squeak as the water soaked her black skirt two piece swimsuit.

Micah smiled as her friend finally joined in. She flipped her black shoulder length hair out of her face. She chuckled as Bri survived another wave and Alec boasted about surviving. Her dark brown eyes interpreting the other wave. She linked arms with the two and charged in. While she was charging in with her two friends, she glanced at their expressions. Bri's pure blue eyes were sparkling with determination. Alec's light caramel brown eyes were shimmering with anticipation, excitement and enjoyment.

They continued this action and sometimes they toppled over. The number of topples went like this, Micah: 8-10 topples, Alec: 5 topples and Bri... Let's just say she had the most falls. The girls laughed before their eyes spotted the biggest, hugest widest wave ever known to them. They exchanged a glance before smirking widely.

At the sane time Bri and Alec shouted, "EXTREME WAVE!" before wading out further.

Micah joined them.

It approached, getting closer and closer. They braced themselves as it hit.

Micah and Alec survived the wave. Unfortunately for Bri, she was pulled under. A good five minutes passed and there was no sign of Bri. Now very panicked, the two girls ran back in to find her. Bri then suddenly resurfaced breathing and gasping heavily for air. The two Immediately went to grab for her. Then the unexpected happened, instead of pulling Bri out of the water they were being sucked in!

"Heiiiiiiii! Bri! Micah! What's happening?" Alec shouted before she was sucked underneath the huge wave first.

Micah squeaked, "how the heck should I know? Ah! Alec! Gah!" Micah was the second to be sucked into the ocean vortex of doom.

Bri didn't even have time to yell out before she was sucked into the water as well. However there were many thoughts running threw her head. 'Where are we going? Are we gonna live? Why isn't the life guard doing his job and saving us? DID I PUT THE MILK AWAY BEFORE WE LEFT?'

A flashing light appeared and the three girls were in a vortex tunnel. The colors clashed against each other. Blue on purple, black on yellow, green on white and other colors that were too bright or dark to describe. Another light was seen at the end of the tunnel, the tight enclosed space they were in before gone. Replaced by open air space and the... Sky? The girls looked down then blinked, before the fell out of the sky.

"HEIIIIIIIIII!"

"CLLLAAAAAANNNNCCCY!"

"NYAMA NYAMA NYA!"

Gravity did it's effect and They fell into the body of water. Sinking to the bottom quickly.

They quickly swam back up to the surface of the water and as they did the eldest of the three girls (and possibly the most intelligent) noticed that the salt content in the water had changed drastically. when they reached air there was something odd about their situation, if they were in the middle of the ocean then why were their feet touching the bottom?

The floor quickly continued to come up at them, when it stopped Micah was piled on top of Bri who then pushed her slightly to the side and asked "where's Alec?" and a hand reached out of the water and shoved them both off.

they all stood and made a quick analysis of where they were whenever the Bri stated simply "weird..."

the middle child, known as Alec, exclaimed "WOAH! we are not in Kansas anymore."

Then Bri proceeded to smack her atop the head.

Enraged, Alec shouted "HEY!" and tackled her much, much shorter friend and as they quarreled in the mud, Micah attempted to stop them but failed and was dragged into it, or rather, under Alec's foot. They fought for several more minutes then Micah looked upon the shore and saw a dark haired boy wearing an eye patch just staring at them with his tea cup half way to his mouth and his lips pursed ready to take a sip when he was interrupted by their arguing.

The two other girls stopped in mid attack, the younger with her hair strewn in her face and on the back of the other who was in mid chomp, mouth agape surrounding Bri's wrist and her messy, orange pony-tail only half existing and Micah's rib cage beneath her heel. Micah's nearly black eyes searched they boy, then she pulled herself up out of the shallow water and placed Alec's foot back on the ground. Alec stood, throwing Bri back into the water with ease.

The boy placed the tea cup back on the saucer and stated bluntly to no where "Sebastian, there are three odd girls in the lake. remove them at once."

then a handsome man in a black suit came through the door with a piece of cake in one hand and said "yes, my lord" and set the cake down near the boy, rolled up his sleeves and entered the shallow body of water before him, trying his best to keep his amusement shown no more than the slight grin on his face. He first offered to help Micah out and she accepted but when Alec was asked she answered with a bite of his hand. He shrugged and lifted her over his shoulder while she continued to bite, scratch and kick though it did nothing. Her attempt to maul him only made him even more amused by these odd creatures. finally he reached into the water to help out the last girl. he pulled her up by her arm and as they walked away, he accidentally tapped her on the neck with his gloved finger which cause something he never expected to happen. Her head flew backwards and her knees collapsed as she fell once again into the water.

"Sebastian?" the boy with the eye patch shouted and the tall man paused and looked startled at the rippling water.

Alec stopped gnawing on the man she assumed to be Sebastian and Micah stopped walking and they looked at each other. Many awkward seconds passed then Alec and Micah started laughing.

Bri's head rose out of the water and she glared at Alec and Micah.

They ceased laughing then resumes as Bri joined in.

Sebastian and the eye-patch-wearing boy looked at them puzzled.

Sebastian shrugged at the boy and helped Bri out of the water once again. They went back to the Phantomhive mansion and Sebastian brought the girls towels.

They eye patch boy began to speak. "What brings you to my home?" he asked slightly annoyed by their presence.

"Well..." the trio said in unison then they all started shouting and yelling at once.

Micah became silent ad looked at the other two and thought 'with these two telling the story, i'm not gonna get anything trough' so she simply watched the show.

While Bri and Alec babbled incoherently, Bri irritatedly threw one hand over Alec's mouth and proceeded to say "we were on the beach in Santa Monica and-"

"Santa Monica" the boy asked.

"Mhm. California."

"...I'm afraid I don't understand..."

"oh, um...America."

The boy looked interested now.

"And we went swimming and we got sucked into the ocean and ended up in your pond." She stopped.

He looked shocked and she finished with a big cheesy smile. He smirked and said "Pardon me. I am Ciel Phantomhive and it has been a pleasure to hear about your..." his smirk grew wider "travels."

Micah we becoming slightly suspicious of Ciel's intentions when Sebastian entered the room again saying "the dresses are ready for you, my ladies."

Alec bit Bri's hand, which was still over her mouth, and shouted "WHAT?"

Sebastian escorted Micah and Bri towards the changing room where 3 appropriate dresses were waiting, however, Alec refused. Sebastian came up and dragged Alec toward the changing area.

Half way inside she clung to the doorway with all her strength as she screamed "NOOOOOOOO!" at the top of her lungs.

He tugged on her ankles but she resisted the urge to loosen her grip on the door.

"I- will- not- w-wear a- d-d"

Sebastian let go of her and she went flying into the tile as she screeched, "DRESS!"

As she flew past Ciel, he place his finger to his temple and shook his head, mumbling "idiots..."

Sebastian, while Alec was stunned from the impact, picked her up and carried her into the dressing room.

As they went in she cried out to her friends "No! MI-CAH! BRI! HELP!" but her friends only watched with anticipation to see their tom-boy-ish friend in a girly outfit such as a dress. They doors closed and everything went quiet. She emerged from the dressing room wearing a poofy sleeved, lacy, light pink and creamy white dress that stopped at her knees, revealing white knee socks with pink frills lining the top, finishing with white shoes with pink buttons. Her hair was up in a curly ponytail held up by a pink ribbon.

"Oh my GOOGLE! you look so adorable!" Bri shrieked at the sight of her friend's gaudy attire.

Alec clenched her fists.

Micah glanced at Bri and said "google?" then, realizing that she wouldn't answer, resumed her awestruck stare at the phenomenon before her eyes.

Then Micah went in to change, though she hurried because she feared that Alec might kill Bri when she was gone. She came out flaunting her well fit, powder blue and snowy white dress, a dark blue string lacing up the front. She had pale blue tights and white shoes, long sleeves cinched at the elbow by a dark blue ribbon tied in a bow.

Sebastian came up and gently placed a light blue rose in her jet black hair. She looked absolutely stunning.

Alec continued clawing at the frills and sequins she was forced to wear.

Finally, Bri went to change. When she did, the long dress swept across the floor, a pale purple corset tied over the plain, black, long sleeved dress.

"The piece de resistance" Sebastian cooed. He raised up a black strip of fabric intended to be a cooker necklace. He advanced towards the fidgety blond girl and placed the necklace over her head and began to tie it in the back but the moment his fingers grazed the back of her neck, her head was thrown back and her knees buckled once again. her hands met the tile as she gasped as if her air had ben cut off for hours. Ciel's expression was shocked but his anxiety faded when Alec demonstrated the reaction multiple times more, causing Bri to cringe and twist as she lay on the floor.

Micah did her best to retain her laugher and half giggled when she said, "see? It's just a reflex."

Suddenly, a man, stripped of all clothing with hair clearly not grayed by age, came running in on all fours, full speed ahead. Tongue hanging out one side, he ran up to Micah who lifted one brow in suspicion then simply shrugged as she adverted her gaze. It wasn't the strangest thing she'd ever seen, not by a long shot. entering after the canine man was an odd trio: one was blond and had two clips in his hair and a hat loosely hanging off his neck.

When he noticed the new visitors, he waved and said "ello," before continuing to chase the man around the room while softly calling "come 'ere, Pluto!"

Next entered the woman with the long, pink hair up in two messy pig tails that barely held on to her maid's hat. She wore thick rimmed glasses that had one cracked lens and she couldn't seem to stop tripping over her own feet, perhaps the only person the girls had ever seen who was clumsier than Alec.

Finally, a man with an apron on and goggles around his neck ran in, but once he reached the door, he decided he was too cool to play tag and he leaned on the frame, instead. A cigarette hung out of his mouth. He squinted ever-so-slightly, crossed his arms, and gestured with his head at the three unfamiliar girls when he asked, "eh! Who are you, then?"

Before any of them answered, the man-dog-thing whom they called Pluto, began frantically barking at Alec whose only rebuttal was a sharp "HEIII" and a mad dash to her nearest victim, in this case, Sebastian, and climbed onto his back like a frightened cat.

The mysterious butler smiled a minuscule smile at the shenanigans of the girl he had clinging with all her might to his shoulders. He found her oddly amusing.

Pluto began running a muck through the (living room), knocking over anything and anyone in his path. The table tottered and toppled, the lamp twisted and teetered. Pluto ran past Bri, who had finally pried herself off the floor thanks to the help of their "gracious" host. As he passed, he rammed himself into the girl's legs, causing her to fall once again onto the floor, accidentally dragging Ciel down with her.

"Oh my google, I'm so sorry!" she said as she stood and reached both hands out towards the young lord.

Despite his urge to shout "I don't need your help! You and your friends GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!" he remembered what they had said about where they had come from. They were nuances, that much was true, but the knowledge they might have possessed? Well, he wasn't quite done with them. So the young lord put on a plastic smile and grabbed the tiny wrists of the equally tiny girl and made his way to his feet. However, Pluto's torment was far from finished. He made one more round about before finally being captured in the crushing embrace of the clippy boy. In his final lap, he proceeded to knock over his master again, onto the spunky blond. He knelt over her and because of her previous gesture of kindness when she was assisting him off the ground, to anyone unaware of the situation, it gave the illusion that Ciel had pinned her down. Fortunately it was no issue, just a simple misunderstanding that was intended to be corrected immediately. But, UNfortunately for the Phantomehive Earl, his childhood friend decided to stop by right at that moment.

"CIEEEEL! I'M HOME!" she called from the entryway.

The room froze.

Ciel became less concerned with what appeared to be the awkward situation he was placed in and more concerned with how he was supposed to explain the three strangers from America that showed up in the lake this morning.

The girl entered the room. Her long curly pigtails bounced and she did. Her step was springy and her eyes were closed as if she were anticipating some sort of surprise. And, boy did she get one. When her eyes opened, all the eyes in the room of all the frozen people were locked on her. This included the awkwardly placed girl who tilted her head back as far as it would go and saw the pigtailed princess standing in the door as being upside down. "Ci-el...?" the girl in the doorway asked, swaying slightly as she braced herself on the door frame. "wh-who is this?" she asked not even looking in their direction as she seemed to favor the view of the floor.

"um, Lizzy, this is Bri." he said, still not bothering to move because his thoughts were far off creating some story about how they're the daughters of some of his aunt Red's old friends from the country club.

"hey, how's it going?" Bri asked casually, not realizing the current situation. To everyone else in the room, it was a simple mistake, a fumble, they had simply been thrown over by the dog, but to Lizzy, it was something far less innocent.

"uh...Ci...e..." but before she could finish, Lizzy decided that she, too, should have the honor of meeting the tile.

Before she could have such the pleasure, the mysterious, raven-haired butler flew across the room at an inhuman speed and caught the falling girl in the fancy pink dress. On his back still perched the orange top in her dreaded 'tu-tu', as she called it, though it was clearly not.

The rest of them gathered around Lizzy, Ciel directly in front of her as he said in his thick British accent "are you feeling alright Lizzy?" though the girl had already began her decent from consciousness.

The last words processed in Lizzy's mind were her love's cries of desperation.

"LIZZY!" Ciel shouted. He placed a hand on her incredibly pale face and demanded Sebastian lay her on the couch.

Lizzy's eyes fluttered wildly as she struggled to regain consciousness. She noticed a glass of water sitting on the newly uprighted table next to the couch. A racket echoed in from the dining room. Lizzy balanced herself using the arm of the seat and made her way to the source of the noise. All of the people in the Phantomhive home were gathered around the long, cherry wood dining table. As expected, Ciel sat at the head of the table. Micah to his right and Bri to his left. The still frazzled Alec sat to the right of her tall, dark friend who slid her glasses back up the bridge of her nose with subtlety when Lizzy entered the room.

Thundering silence filled the room.

Lizzy came in with a strait face instead of her usually smiling one. She took her place at the opposite head of the table from Ciel. Lizzy stared hard at him from across the dining room.

Ciel picked up his fork and twirled it between his thumb and first two fingers when he nonchalantly asked "So, Lizzy, what brings you here today?"

"Just a typical visit" She grasped the knife on the table, rage in her eyes, "But, I want to know what brings THEM here?" She pointed the knife at Bri to make it apparent the question was directed at her more than anyone else.

Bri quickly looked down and began tracing the intricate carvings of the table with her index finger.

Ciel had a ready bite of duck a la ronge perched atop his fork but decided to place his fork on his plate and say "Sebastian, I do believe it's time for dessert."

Lizzy's face lit but for only a moment before she continued her glaring.

Within a few seconds, the butler had returned with a plate of 3 different kinds of cheese cakes: 3 slices of Chocolate, 3 slices of Original, and 3 of Strawberry. He passed them out in the order of MayLin, Strawberry, Lizzy Strawberry, that guy, Original, Finny, Chocolate, Bri, Chocolate, skipping over Ciel as it is polite to serve guests first, Micah, original, Alec, Chocolate...

"Wait, wait, WAIT..." why do I get chocolate when there is a perfectly good Strawberry right there?" Alec pointed at the piece on the tray.

Sebastian pushed down her finger and smiled as he said "that piece is for the young lord."

"I don't care if its for the Queen of Sheeba," She pulled down on Sebastian's tie until he was eye level with her, "no one," She pulled harder, "NO ONE, gets between me,"She jabbed her thumb to her chest, "and my strawberry!" She said, once again pointing violently at the tray. As Alec continued with threats of castration, Ciel placed his elbow on the table and leaned in on his hand.

"Is that fear I see on Sebastian's face?" he mumbled to himself all too amused.

Bri leaned in close without taking her eyes off the carrot-top, "yes, I do believe it is."

Micah chimed in :she tends to have that effect on people." She slid her glasses back up her face again.

Ciel twitched, "why did I let these imbeciles into my home?"

Micah replied "I dunno..."and shrugged before Alec shouted "FOR THE STRAWBERRIES!" before taking a bite of her victory trophy.

"Because we're AWESOME!" Bri sang out.

Lizzy sighed "because you hate me..."

Sebastian smiled wide and chose to join in on the fun. "I believe they are your pawns, sir," he said, slipping Ciel a black chess piece, the king, "and what is a king without his pawns?" Sebastian said.

Pleased, Ciel smirked as well, gripping the piece in his hand, "of course." He then turned to MayLin. "Prepare our guests...for bed." He proceeded to walk Lizzy to the front door then said as if to no where, "I'm growing weary. Sebastian I wish to sleep now as well."

A scream cam from the guest bathroom "NO! NO WATER!" Alec hissed. She clawed and scratched at MayLin.

Micah and Bri were already bathed and ready for bed. They wore lacy nightgowns that corresponded with the colors of the dresses they had worn that day. Bri's was sinnched at the waist and stopped at her knees while Micah's was much longer and draped over her beautifully.

MayLin had finally given up on Alec's bath. She said "Oh, I ave the loveliest dress for you, I do." and came back with a pink and white dress which was enough to make Alec shriek.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHH!" as she ran full throttle down the ever extending hallway.

After much time, a cage, and a bull whip, she was eventually captured and wrestled into the dress by the pink haired maid and the two giddy traitors.

As Sebastian prepared Ciel for bed, Ciel bluntly asks "so, what is going on between you and the orange headed girl?"

Sebastian looked startled at first and then smiled and calmly stated "I'm afraid I don't know what you mean."

"Don't play games with me, Sebastian, I saw how you were looking at her."

Sebastian slipped off Ciel's eye patch revealing his eye that was abnormally colored and glowed to mark the bond between him and his demon.

"I do think she even frightened you."

Sebastian's face went stern, "that's preposterous."

But Ciel only shrugged, knowing he was proven correct but giving Sebastian the benefit of the doubt.

"And what about you and the blond?" Sebastian asked, returning the favor.

"That's ridiculous. What happened was all just an accident."

Sebastian finished buttoning Ciel's night shirt, nodded and left. Ind the dead of night, the door to the master bedroom clicked open.

Ciel wearily woke up and said "Sebastian, I don't have time for your games..." more than a little agitated, he sat up with his back to the door.

He was startled to hear a girl's voice at the door say "do you always expect your butler in the middle of the night?"(KYYAAAH!~ YAOI!~ Ahem)

Ciel reached for the dresser in a panic, determined to put on his eye patch before whoever it was saw him without it. The lamp turned on right as he finished tying it. Ciel brought his hands down from behind his head, "more so him than you."

She sat at the foot of his bed as Ciel shifted himself into a more comfortable position, "so, what are you doing in my room?"

"I just..." she scooted closer to him, "I just wanted to see something." Her voice was soft and shaky.

"s-something?" Ciel stuttered, placing his finger tips to the corner of his eye patch.

She pulled her feet up onto the bed and sat on her knees.

He backed up further against the head board. He cringed slightly as she crept closer and closer. He felt her cold hand on the side of his face, grazing the ties tat kept his secret from the world. He tensed and prepared for the worst, but in a single moment, his suspicions were proven to be completely off base. The moment when all the conspiracies he had conjured up, vanished. the moment her lips met his.

He was awestruck by the turn of events and was so stunned that he just sat there wide eyed for several seconds until the utter shock transformed into pleasant surprise.

She ran her fingers through his jet black hair and he timidly put one hand on her back. For a moment, he actually enjoyed it.

But moments end.

She pulled away and pressed her lips together to think and then left with a resounding "Hm… good to know."

Sebastian was arriving at the young lord's room when he noticed something strange, the light in the room was still flickering.

The door handle twisted and Sebastian hid in the shadows. He watched curiously as Bri stepped out and scurried down the never ending hallway. The light in the room turned of and the only light left was the demon butler's glowing red eyes in the darkness. Sebastian smirked and returned the way he came with a taunting "sleep well, my lord," and disappeared into the cover of night.

**AN: HI! OK, THIS IS A FAN FICTION…. OBVIOUSLY. I INSERTED MY TWO FRIENDS AND I INTO BLACK BUTLER, HENCE THE B.A.M.**

**B= BRI**

**A=ME, 13ANIMENURD13**

**M=MICAH.**

**THE WAY THE THREE ACT IN THE STORY IS HOW WE ACT IN REAL LIFE EVERYDAY, FOR REAL AND LITERALLY, NO EXAGGERATIONS! WE REALLY DO BEHAVE LIKE THIS EVERYDAY.**

**THANKS FOR READING! I LOOK FORWARD TO YOUR REVIEWS!~**

**CIAO CIAO!~**


End file.
